Monday, May 23, 2005

Happy Birthday..!!!

It's finally a year i've started this blog. Happy Birthday!!


Exam still on..*Sigh*...!!

Thursday, May 12, 2005

Lousy but heart warming?

You know, most blockbuster movies has the worse critics judgments of all. It makes me wonder a lot on what accounts does critics judge these movies. What are their judgments based on. But then, there is no such thing like a written criteria on what's the virtues or characteristics or certain requirements needed to be graded as excellent, good or lousy movies. But then, we always complain lousy endings or lousy story line of movies, like its the same old thing running again. Just re-packaged differently added with some extra new things. But it still got our attention didn't it.? Apparently we just fall for it over and over again. And most of these movies is about love, whether between your life partners or families or friends and even pets. And sometime the message was emphasized so strong that we're always touched by it. Most heart warming movies, with the world most simple story line can be a major blockbuster. Because, what gets into your heart matters most.

But then, I'm not saying that adrenaline pumping movies is not heart warming or what. They're still nice, exciting and nteresting plot that made you drooled over them. And perhaps you never realized or did realize but never thought about it, every single movie whether horror, adventure, comedy or action has bits of romance in it.? In other words, it conveys the message of love. And that's where humans fall for it. Feel so happy or touched because it caught us. And with that, every other elements in that movies seems much more pleasant or nicer.

I personally prefer English movies to eastern one. Be it drama series or movies, I still prefer the English one. Why.? Because well, for the eastern thingy especially Chinese, not only that it's always the same message, even most of the plot is the same. Practically, It's so similar that you actually know what's gonna happen next or how it's gonna be or why did that happen. It's so predictable that eventually you lost the interest to go on watching it. So familiar that you can actually plot them yourself. So, why bother watching it.? Another thing is, it's so sickening that eastern movies copied western movies ideas. Maybe it's not copying, REFERRING only, but then, its still basically not original. And English or western idea's are well, not so dead. It seems that they got more to act or I don't know, fresher ideas perhaps.? Though not brilliant ones.?

I've been neglecting to watch a movie for a long time. It's like, I was so anxious to watch that movie at first, to download it, to get it. But once I got hold of it, I just laid back. Like,"Why bother.? It's not going anywhere. You can watch it anytime as you pleased. What's the rush.?" And two days ago, I watched it. It was magnificent. So heart warming that I shed tears for it. So touching. It could be simple, but it's just so nice. And it totally contains something that got the heart of Oscar for it has lots of Oscar nominations. But most of all, I was attracted to the movie at first because of the actor, Johnny Depp. Heheheh. Anyway, what I'm talking about is Finding Neverland. It's just amazing why certain simple story line's always manage to get into our hearts. Just like what critics labeled as rubbish or unbearable.

A walk to remember, do I like it.? I love it.
Is it simple.? Way too simple.
Is it heart warming.? Definitely.

Monday, May 09, 2005


06 May 2005...2015

Sometimes, life is so unpredictable or funny that its a wonder how sudden certain perspective in life could be introduced to you in a split second. Put it the other way, its not introduced, its just something that's been buried in you for a long time, and they're brought up to the surface because, finally they're being recognized. This happens a lot to me. Because well, I'm very obstinate.

I was washing the dishes about 30 minutes ago, when suddenly the thought of my childhood friends venture into my brain cells. Call me insane or what, but most of my ideas or thoughts came to me whenever I'm doing something on my own, be it washing the dishes, massaging my dad, jogging, swimming or just even laying down. Anyway, I realize that my childhood friends are mostly English literate, as in, our primary language in school is English. We do speak Chinese but not much. For your information, I'm not Chinese literate. I speak Hakka and Cantonese due to my parents origin, but I learn mandarin from school or friends. I can't read Chinese but I've improved after a year or two of kindergarten Chinese tuition when I was still in primary school. And my level of Chinese words now is just enough to understand forward emails, song lyrics and SMS. And that's why most of my childhood primary school friends are also Chinese blind. Chinese blind, but not Chinese mute or Chinese deaf. We understand Chinese well enough, we just don't know the words. But then, it's still a little embarrassing. We might be not if we're living 10 or 20 years back, for everyone is so proud to be English literate. But then for today, it is. There was once I was totally embarrassed when a Malay guy ask me about the headlines of a Chinese newspaper and he was shocked when I said I couldn't read Chinese. And he made no effort to hide his surprise. I mean afterall, why should he.? He didn't tease me or what, but he started to keep wondering what those words mean with other Malay girls. Then, I went over to have a look at the newspaper, and thank god, I happen to just know those few words. Back to my friends, did I mention, I was enrolled in a Malay primary school.? Why Malay, not English.? Well, non-Chinese primary school are actually more Malay than English, though most people would say it's English. You can say it now, but back to my time in primary school, it was really Malay school.

Then, things change when we get into secondary school, naturally we spoke more Chinese. But then, it changed even more for me. I transferred to KK when I was in form 2 and got into All Saints and mind you, I got into one of the bottom class. Why.? Contributions of an old man who is about to retired in a week who just shoooooo me into any class which has available seats. Anyway, it was the kind of experience I'll never forget. And that must be the laziest year of my whole education life. Why.? At first I do mind about the status of being in one of the bottom classes, but it didn't bother me long. It was fun. The people was fun. They weren't that selfish. They won't be guarding you all day long just in case you could scored better in your mathematics paper. And that's also when I speak Chinese most of the time. Did my English suffer.? Well, I was never top English student or whatever, I just sank to the average level. After form 2, I switch to Lok Yuk, where once again I'm back to usual class standard. It was obvious who are the Chinese gang and who are the English gang. Everyone was friendly and knowing someone in advanced, she brought me to the Chinese gang. Well bout those gangs, all of us speak Chinese, but the English gang are just the upper English level compared to Chinese gang, who is average. As for me, I just got close to one of the girl from the Chinese gang. I mean really close until today. And I guess I was the only one from the 'Chinese gang' that has a better relationship with the English gang. Somehow, this sort of changes reflected my language literacy. I spoke English a lot as well, but only to certain people. But when it comes to close one, Chinese is always the top priority. Except my dad who loves to lectures me in English.

And now that I'm in tertiary education level, (mind you, Form 6 might be in secondary school but it's definitely tertiary level) I speak even more English. But I still speak Chinese with my own close friends. But English still lingers with my conversation. I've actually got commented that my Chinese sounds weird. Weird it has some sort of accent or slang which obviously shows that I'm not Chinese literate. I speak fast whether in English or Chinese, but I can never scold in Chinese. I'll get stucked. I can't remember those words. Or simply I don't know what word to use. And with the ego in me, I don't like to lose. Perfectionist.?Maybe a little. I just well, shoots in English with some speed that most of them kept quiet not because they're afraid of me. But because they could hardly catch a word I said. Hahaha. Very funny. I can even shoot in Chinese, but only simple ones. Heheheh...

06 May 2005..2045



I have been getting lots and lots of idea cramming in my brain cells at the same time which is both good and bad. But the thing is, when you know you don't have the time to blog or you just couldn't blog (compliments of tmnet), It's like, my mind is really killing me. I resist the idea of writing it down, I don't like the idea of writing my thoughts in public where there's too much of distraction. And I'm a easily distracted person. Once distracted, I could loss my mood, and temporarily loss my motivation. Hahaha. I sound like some sort of writer or journalist who just got knock at their doors during their busiest time of the century.

Anyway, I'm getting sick of childish person. Undeniable that there's a child within each person that occasionally will be revealed when it's relevant or when nature's strikes. But it gets irritating when the supposedly innocent act got out of hand. And earn a new image of immature and naive instead of the 'child within' in which is acceptable if not misused. I'm not saying that I'm a very mature person but I know when it's essential to behave myself and when to get a little immature and have fun. But as it's usually is, I tend to drop to the lowest level of all at home. Because no matter how hard I try, I'm still the youngest 'endangered protected species' which is forever the baby. It's not like I'm not taken seriously, but it's just hard to bite back and turn old and mature all of a sudden. In other words, my mature side is more visible to outsiders.

Another weakness of most homo sapiens is that we're always too blinded by the weaknesses and past of people and most of the time couldn't see the change or the good sight of them until it's too late. Could it be the nature of each person self defense in which their afraid they'll lose.? Or simply because they're too narrow minded to believe it even if everything is shove under their very nose.? This is when nature calls. It's pretty sickening when you're trying so hard but they won't accept it just because you had a past. In other words, you were wrong before. Or simply because you don't use to behave like that and the sudden change is unacceptable to most people for they find it threatening of their usual self compared to others drastic improvements or simply they're too thick to believe something called 'change over a new leaf'. And this is only when the sudden change is something good. If it's something bad, It'll just swarm right into their brain cells at the very first moment without any negligence and remain there for the rest of their lives. This annoying perspective is the nature for most people. For well, humans are the usual selfish person who isn't so generous to turn a blind eye for other people's weak spot.