Wednesday, October 19, 2005

I'm blank

The day it's drawing nearer. Am I dreading it.? Actually, no. Afraid, nervous but not dreading it at all. Wishing it to be over as soon as possible.

I went blank today, the feeling was bad. It sucks. It was in the middle of our informal second trial Chemistry Paper 2 section B. I didn't pass up the paper, enough said. It was informal after all but I wasted another chance of good revision. Second time of the week. This is bad. Am I stressed or simply just not prepared.?

It pains to think back and compare the SPM years. Where clearly the effort wasn't as much as now but the results is opposite. Is STPM really that hard or I just grew stupid due to "indescribable" STPM.? Well, I've known this even before stepping in Form 6.

Worrying sucks but one just couldn't stop it like the STOP button in your CD player. I can worry continuously. As usual, worrying brings you no where but human just love to worry so much no matter how rational or how clearly they know that worry doesn't help. In fact it worsen the condition. But, we're humans after all. We are emotional creature with feelings and is that suppose to be good or bad.? Too bad for me, worries couldn't motivate me that much. But I still have to go forward and leave them behind. What to do, I'm not the only human on earth who knows to worry. Everyone worries, just that the impact or effect of worries varies for every different person and how you choose to deal with it. Do you let your worries manipulate your mind and monopolize your brain cells.? Or your brain cells controls your worries.? Somehow, there are moments in life that your brain contains nothing but WORRY. Which of course is only temporary. The period of it's residency.? Again, it depends on how well you organize yourself or simply how you think. And the shorter it is, the better it is. For if it remain too long, it could be fatal. And no, suicide doesn't count as the short cut of settling your worries. Haven't you heard.? The short cut is always the bad cut.

This is just the same with emotion and feelings. Its commonly said, do not let your feelings and emotions control your mind. Your mind controls your feelings and emotion. My oh my. But human no matter who and how great or perfect he/she is, they still run into these moments where they'll get a little blank or lose a little control of their brains. Why.? That's because you're still a human being no matter what. So chill. It's okay (but don't overflow o you'll puke.)

" Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? " Mathews 6:27

" Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of it's own. " Mathews 6:34

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