Friday, June 23, 2006

I'm blessed.

I woke up this morning, feeling blessed. How often do you honestly actually really felt you're blessed.?

The appreciative mode that's hardly there. We're never grateful of what we have. You've only counted your unlucky and bad days. But not good ones. More like, our eyes are accustomed to see only what we do not have, but turn a blind eye to what we have.

That's why you'll never see your luck even if it's right in front of your stubborn eyes. Luck is always with the one who doesn't need it. Did they realize how fortunate they were because they didn't need it.? No, because they saw it. When you need it desperately and it comes by, it'll go by unnoticed. Because you'll just grab it conveniently without a doubt.

I guess the same applies to the "You'll only appreciate what you have once you lost it."

Slightly different to the "You'll never know what you have until one day you realize you no longer need what you have".


Recent happenings seems like a television to me. Images flashing in front of my eyes and POOF.!!

My next step is queued up for me. Next destination slowly building up their imaginary appearance or expectations are created in my tiny brain cells that's all self working busily lately keeping me occupied.

My heart tells me I should be grateful. Am I not.? I think no. I do know what I have, what my fate and luck has brought me and I couldn't be more happy about it. Perhaps, my melancholy has blinded me in expressing my gratitude. Or the sudden fact that slapped me across my face wake me from my seven months of slacking.

So, I should count my blessings. Here goes.

1) I should be grateful for being granted the fifth choice out of the eight programs and universities I applied despite scoring only an average CGPA in STPM.
2) I should be grateful that I got what I wanted and that's to get out of here even though it's not a city of my top choices.
3) I should be grateful that a close girlfriend-classmate is going to the same place as I am even though we're in different faculty and college.
4) I should be grateful I have my family going KL with me for an early shopping spree despite mum declare herself being unfair because non of my elder siblings has this baby sitting process during furthering their studies away from home.
5) I should be grateful I'm sorted into a college (hostel) that's extremely near to my faculty even though it's a pretty run out place with food that you can hardly chew.
6) I should be grateful my college has internet coverage despite it has a lousy connection.
7) I should be grateful I have seniors I've known for years studying in the same Uni and being in the same faculty as I am is helping me out. A lot.
8) I should be grateful I have people around me helping my preparation even though at the same time some are driving me up the wall.
9) I should be grateful with what I have but not what I need that's an extra benefit. Even though sometimes it makes me feel bad when there's other who need it more than I do and there's nothing I can do about it.
10) I should be grateful that I'm being grateful.

Trying my best to be positive in practicing optimism while unable to avoid the realism I have in my obstinate blood. Hey, at least I tried.

What can I say, I'm blessed. =))

1 comment:

Pyin said...

hmm.. all i can say is this... GAMBATEH-NEH!!!... feel like less talk liao both of us. hai~~... wish u all the best darling.... * hugs *