Thursday, January 21, 2010

Nam Yu Gai Yik

To think that there will be no special surprise delivery in the upcoming months just pierces me :(

Wednesday, January 06, 2010

Family

Abang took a china tea cup filled with Bo Lei tea in his left hand, while his right was holding a small transparent bag filled with dad's medicine, and walk towards him. Dad put down his spatula and wipe his hands on the apron before taking the pills.

Dad asked if I ate any of the big rosy apples, I said no. Then he took out an orange, and started cutting them into slices and put a few of them in front of me. Seeing that I ate them, he took out another and repeated the cycle. Both of us shared two oranges :)

I took the garbage out as usual, preparing to wash my hands in the porch, and get back into the house to close the gate. But tonight, I didn't. Because mom closed the gate from inside the house before I got in.

All this happened within 15 minutes tonight. Tiny little gestures within a family, happening perhaps on a daily basis, long forgotten the beauty of it, but tonight it made me smile. I wondered if I'm getting old, or plain wiser in simply being grateful of my family.

Saturday, January 02, 2010

New Year

2009 is probably the year with the least post written, and published. Not that it's a year that was least happening, in fact, perhaps its just the opposite.

The time one has is limited, one has to delegate among other things and I'm afraid at this point, my dear blog is slightly pushed to the other side.

I graduated, I started working, I ventured into the blood sucking world where your sole compensation is the pay check at the end of the month. I went on boat rides on a monthly basis, with God watching over me as I'm obviously not eaten by any crocs. Working over hours, unsatisfied yet not entirely unhappy. Yes most of the time I'm confused and lost on my own position.

It was a year full of prompt decisions, followed by immediate actions. Calling it a stressful year would indeed be an understatement. Tracing it back now, it seems surreal, from squeezing through my final semester quickly changing into the working scene. As usual, everything is moving too quickly, you're not given the time to adjust yourself to it, instead, you just go along. Sometimes not even registering what that's actually happening.

I think my brain has been evolving a little too fast in absorbing what that has happened, and what that has not. Even more, decisions made that involved a party too much, yes I despise having to make decisions for someone else other than me, especially if everything puts me on the line, alone.

The emotional strain in me went sky rocketing and plunge deep more than too often within these 12 months, perhaps its a miracle I'm still standing straight. It surprises me my feelings or emotion can deal with such tremendous fluctuation on a regular basis. Or perhaps, as many would say, I appeared feeling-less.

Love has once found me again, and mended a broken heart. Let's pray it shall stay that way.

And I gave up having new year resolutions, for I always forgot what they were, not to mention keeping them.

At a point, I think its more because I don't believe in new year's resolution. Don't get me wrong, I trust that if a person makes up their mind to do something, they can do it. There's nothing wrong with making a resolution, I just don't believe that you need a date or a festive season to mark it.

Perhaps, people do it as a habit, taking it for granted that it marks a new beginning and hence maybe a little change can do some good to them too.

And who could blame them? Life is after all constantly changing, and our brain has evolved in a way to adapt to these changes and still move forward.

On a last note, it's a pretty darn good year, with it's equal share of joy and sadness and let us pray the year ahead would be even more colourful.